Temporary Title (Will NU catch this? I hope not.)

Hopefully NU doesn’t catch this… I wonder if anyone will actually see this?
This is the first half of this part. I felt like I might as well throw this out there since it’s decently long (and because I’m so slow), but I won’t update it on NU until I finish the whole thing. I finished my finals, so maaaybe I’ll be a bit less lazy with the translation during this break.

 

Gomen ne, Oniisama Chapter 4 part 2(.1)

Those Who Betray

http://ncode.syosetu.com/n9427cc/20/

She was inherently greedy, a person full of jealousy.
Disgusted by her own body, lacking as it was in talent.
Jealous of her superiors, who were gifted with opportunities.
Those who don’t develop themselves are looked down upon.
Merely feeling a jealous grudge towards others without doing anything, it ended up being the driving force for her diligence as she grew.
As a natural result, she ended up being able to enter an exceptional career, a role where everything she had desired would be in her hands.
Awaiting her was a brilliant future, a future that everyone envied, and the woman had no hesitation in walking on that road.

However, it was all ruined by the failures of her master.
The glittering future that was in her hands, all of it.

The woman reached a position closer to the apex of power than anyone, but she didn’t believe it was because she was any better than those similar to her.
Although she was convinced she could overtake them if she had decades to gain experience, the gap in experience between them was too large.
Rather, as a promising youth, she was taken of for the future. In the case of an emergency- in the case of a situation like this, she lacked the presence, the ability to affect anything.
Neither her own treatment, nor the treatment of her master, or the treatment of outsiders, there was nothing where the woman’s opinion was reflected.
Her future will have only darkness remain.
Unable to fulfill a single one of her desires.

She could only do one thing- abandon her falling master, and seek a new power. Only then can her wishes be accomplished.
So, riding around on a horse, asking people, she did anything she could.
The woman was originally in an isolated top position and thus had difficulties seeking the aid of others, and it resulted in many failed efforts.
But the woman continued running around, refusing to give up; lowering her head wherever necessary, and kept collecting information.

And finally, after spending days, she found the location. It was so close to the Royal City it could be said to have been hidden in the shadow of the lighthouse.
If you travel at full speed for a few hours on a horse you will reach a forest, in which a small mansion stands, as though it is hiding in the grove.
The mansion- no, the surroundings of the mansion was full of strange magic.
Although the magic energy feels as though it is drifting gently through the air, the amount of magic energy in the area is enormous.

After considering it to that extent, the woman quietly shook her head to clear her random thoughts.

Although this place is strongly magical, it is too close to the Royal City, and it would be difficult to use as a base since as it is too far from the battlefield.
Although it was also considered as a possible location for a clinic, the forest is too far for convenient transportation.
Besides, this land is privately owned in the first place.

A symbol allowed only to be used by the royal family is engraved on the door, the symbol of a deceased.
In the past it was the personal mansion of that person, and upon their death, should have been inherited by this woman’s master.
However, a mansion like this was not listed in the inventory taken by the head office.
Although it may be hidden property, it is adorned with the symbol of royalty so it can still be found.
―In the first place, considering the presence contained in this mansion, it’s not surprising that the mansion was hidden away although it’s in perfect condition.

She knocked on the door of the mansion with a bit of strength, but there was no answer.
But, she had a strange conviction that the owner of the house was inside.
Judging that she was permitted to enter as she wasn’t attacked, she opened the creaky old door.
Stepping into the slightly dark room, finally finding the one she was seeking, the woman lowered her voice and spoke.

“At last, I was able to meet you.”

The room lit up, revealing a man sitting in a chair, his eyes slowly opening as he stared piercingly at her.

“….I’m sure you were looking for me for a shitty reason, but your dedication, at least, is amazing. What is your business?”

The number of times she had heard that voice could be counted on a single hand.
This would be the first time it had been directed towards her.
Towards this man, she always felt nothing but fear.
Of the absolute difference in ability between them, and of the sin he has committed.
Even now, she was holding back the tremors she felt on the inside, as she removed her hood and kneeled on the floor, bowing to that man.

“I wish to ask for a favor from you.”

The man stood up and walked over to her, narrowing his copper-red eyes in interest.
He scratched the underside of her chin lightly with his finger.
The nail pulled off a bit of skin, and some blood dripped on the floor.

“What will I gain by accepting this request?”

Though she furrowed her eyebrows for a moment at the feeling of her skin being torn, her gaze didn’t diverge from that copper-red color.
Though his temperament had large differences from the other one she knows with pupils of this color, some similarities still existed.
Both this man, and her former master, were inherently indifferent to others.
Therefore, this man was unlikely to hold any anger towards her past actions.

“I could just kill you here. Not a single person would care if you died. Nobody looks at you. Nobody thinks about you. Because you are a traitor.”

Each word, one by one, cuts at her emotions.
She harbored no anger.
So, she only shook.
But, everything he said was true.

“….I.. know.”

Whatever sin she committed, whoever despised her, even while feeling jealous, she was happy because that one person cared about her.
But that was just a fantasy.
As this man says, that person never trusted or cared about her.
Even if she were to die here―

“Even so, it makes no difference. You can do whatever you want with me.”

Up close, only cruelty is visible in the staring man’s eyes.
The words that came from her mouth were strong.
The feelings hidden behind those words were entirely the opposite.
Unsightly, unable to hide what she foolishly desires, unable to even fake it.
However, this was the only hand available to the woman to fulfill her wish.

“I will die for you. I will dirty my hands for you. I will devote the rest of my life to you. So, then would you please lend me your strength?”
“……”

She stared challengingly, having said her oath all at once, and the man met the her gaze silently.
The words the woman spoke were the second time she had made such an oath.
They were words that didn’t deserve to be believed.
However, there was no other way than with these words for her to fulfill her wish.

“Please”

As she closed her mouth without finishing her words, the man, after a moment, sighed deeply.
He glanced at the portrait of a girl with blond hair hanging on the wall, and seeming to give up, spoke to the woman.

“I’m unable to believe that you would be willing to pay with your life….. Well, it’s fine. I have a promise to keep. What is it you desire from me?”

Surely, her master would not forgive her.
Because her master is an aloof, solitary, sorrowful person, who doesn’t abandon those who cling to them.
But that person hates anything that stands in the way of their goals, a person who pursues what they aim for with everything they have.
This woman lacks the power to block that path.
So that’s why, she spoke these words of betrayal with joy.

“The current head of the Ruzil, I want you to erase with your hands.”

It was her second betrayal, the last betrayal of this life.

 

 

Next part. – In progress. Estimated time of completion – someday.

Gomen ne, Onii-sama 4-1

I’m…. a little lazy. Ok, I’m really lazy. Sorry. Or should I say gomen?

Interesting to note that the title of the previous chapter is “The Villain’s Story” and this chapter is titled “My Story”. Also, this is the final chapter, with 8 parts, followed by an epilogue and an extra chapter. Note on translation speed/progress/update/continuation at end.

edit – after looking at next chapter, edit to something that now makes more sense.


Gomen ne, Oniisama Chapter 4 part 1

Those Who Have Lost (Something)

My body feels like it’s immersed in a quagmire, unable to move.
As time passed, though I felt that something was leaving my body, I was unable to move a single finger.
I wonder, did I die?
Though, I feel that there wasn’t time for me to think like this when I died last time.
As I feel myself slowly sinking deeper into the mire- someone.. a big hand grabs my arm and began pulling me out.
I didn’t want an ending like this- someone is crying.
This is your story- someone is apologizing.
Please don’t die- someone is praying.
A language I’ve heard before, but a voice I’ve never heard- that’s right, it’s the language I used to speak- “【Origa】won’t die like this,” it said.

So, come on, wake up.

As if led by those words, far away, I hear a voice calling me.
Far away, I feel a hand touching me.
Far away, I feel mana pouring in.
The feeling of being restrained by a quagmire begins to go away, and softly my consciousness begins to rise.
Ah, but, I want to sleep, just a little more.
However, my faint consciousness was gently pulled to the surface by cold hands— I slowly opened my eyes.

“….riga-sama, Origa-sama”

The first thing to come into my weak, hazy vision was a middle aged man’s face.
I don’t think I’ve ever seen this person.

“….Go… d?”
“I’m just a healer… Well, it’s good that you’ve regained consciousness. It was getting rather dangerous.”

As I speak while slowly blinking, my throat aches with dull soreness.
The pain is real but I still don’t quite understand the situation.
When I try to get up, my arm collapses under me powerlessly and I’m stuck on the bed. How did I get here?
The man helped me sit up, and rang the bell sitting on the bedside table.
As I looked around idly, trying to understand the situation, I realized that I was in a familiar room.

“…I, am alive?”
“Of course you are. I’d be in trouble if you weren’t. Well, here we go, do you remember your name?”

I said my name in a hoarse voice, and the man looked into my eyes as he handed me a pitcher.

“Good. It seems your consciousness is stable.”

Why am I here?
How did I not die on the battlefield?
As I opened my mouth to ask what happened, Keika ran in the room and broke down crying upon seeing my face. I ended up missing the timing to ask…
I ended up staring at her somehow still dignified appearance as she cried like a child, while rubbing my hands together weakly.
-Recalling the feeling of someone gently pulling my hand in my dream.

According to the explanation I received from Keika, once she calmed down and finished crying, it seems my survival after losing consciousness could only be described as a miracle.
Although Keika, who had been part of the feint, had already returned to the fort, she quickly got some knights from the fort and came to help when she noticed the pillar of flames rising near the fortress.
It seems I didn’t regain consciousness for more than ten days due to the combination of going past my limit to heal Atlas and the overdose of medicine my body wasn’t used to.
Although Atlas was also in severe condition, he was helped by a skilled healing mage who was in the fort.

As if it were a miracle of God- it seems, I’m not allowed to leave the stage so easily.
With the fact that Atlas has survived, the hero’s path hasn’t been broken yet.
But I…
With my consciousness more steady, I can feel some incongruity in my chest.
The place where power normally flowed freely, I have a feeling of absence.
Although I want to deny it, the man is just staring absently at the floor while Keika explains the events that have occurred since I fell unconscious.
After she finishes a brief explanation, she continues rambling with a trembling voice, while the man who has been continuously using healing magic says that it should be enough for me to move around, and looks away.

“Well then, Keika. I suppose I should be going now.”
“Wh…. Origa has only just woken up. Even if you say she’ll be fine, I can’t allow such careless treatment of Origa, the family head of the Ruzil.”

When she heard the words of the man who seems to be a healer, she used such words to respond.
I raise my head to see why she’s so worried. I smile weakly to say, you don’t need to worry, since I’m alright, but on her face I can see the shadows of resignation and fatigue.
……Did something happen while I was unconscious?

“Miss Keika. Please don’t misunderstand. I came here at the request of the Ruzil clan, not Origa. My client isn’t in this room.”

As he looks at Keika, trying to protest, the healer lowers his head deferentially.

“Origa-sama, I would like you to move to the guest room now. Of course, as a healer I have no intention of making you do anything unreasonable for your health. But as you have regained consciousness, the duty I was given was to bring you in front of them. Please be understanding.”

At the words of the healer, Keika looks down, chagrined.
If she’s not the one who hired him, I suppose it must have been one of the heavyweights from the family.
Healing magicians are quite rare in the first place, and they don’t have much of a connection with the Ruzil.
Rather than notifying me through Keika, they’re directly requesting me to come to the room.
This type of handling is already not how the head of a family would be treated― I did try to abandon them, so I suppose it can’t be helped.
So. What Atlas risked his life to save, is only this.

“I don’t mind… Keika, can you change my clothes?”

Although I managed to move my legs from the bed and stand up without trembling, indeed, somewhere in my body, there is no strength.
Because I’m aware of what it means, I can understand Keika’s strange behavior of trying to hold on to the healer.
She chose to betray my predecessor because of my disproportionate power to obtain a higher standing, and now that position is in danger.
She’s that kind of character.¹
The words we exchanged as I changed into some simple clothing were monotonous, and she continued to force out a bright voice and act as though nothing was going to happen.

As I enter the room with Keika’s aid, although all the people waiting here are familiar faces from the higher ups of the clan, they all have stern expressions.
Sitting in a chair provided by the doctor, as standing would be bad for me, their gazes all lock on to me.
Is it sorrow, anxiety, or anger on their faces?
But nobody speaks a word, and only the quiet sound of breathing fills the room.

“……Professor. Please tell me the current condition of my body.”²

I broke the silence, unable to bear their constant gaze.
The healer nodded, looked at the men around the room and started explaining.
He started with my body being left with no physical wounds, the drugs had no side effects, and that I would recover my physical strength soon.
Speaking only of the good things, avoiding what I really wanted to know.
Perhaps afraid to continue past the good things, he stuttered and stopped speaking for a moment before continuing.

“Origa-sama, you will probably be unable to use magic by yourself. No, it would be after one more use. It appears that your【vessel】has been cracked.”

At those words, I slowly lower my eyes.
I was aware.
The feeling in the depths of my body has been missing.
There is no pain, but there is a sense of loss.
I can’t feel a trace of that huge magical power.
Most of the magic【Origa】possessed is a congenital talent, not acquired through training.
So I can tell easily how much was lost.

“If the lack of magical power is compensated you can still exercise magic! Origa is good at magic control, so even if the magical power is low,”

“No, that’s not the case.”

Keika’s words, vehemently trying to dispel the silence, were cut off by the doctor.

“The generation of magic power will continue at the same level as normal people, but the vessel itself… the outlet is broken.”

Imagine a teapot, the doctor said with an apologetic face.
Most of the pot is cracked, and moreover, the pouring spout has collapsed and is unable to release the accumulated magical power.
However, although the magical power generation has greatly declined, it will still accumulate at the level of an average mage.
Eventually, the broken vessel will be filled with magical power, and will overflow.

“….If magical power continues to accumulate in your body, it will cause damage when it overflows from your vessel. From now on, keep a magician by your side, and regularly release the excess mana.”

He spoke in a quiet voice, rubbing his hands together with a pained expression.
Nobody in the room opens their mouth.
But they all continued breathing as they stared at me.

When I blankly raised my gaze, my eyes met Keika’s― she stepped back, with a shocked expression on her pale face.
This is probably a particularly shocking event for her, I thought somewhere in my head.
Because she’s like a representation of the Ruzil family’s constitution.
Loving power, disdaining helplessness, seeking perfection― that is Ruzil.
The head of the clan that can’t even use magic without assistance.
The end of the reign of a genius.
I’ve how those without ability see the gifted since I was a child- no, I already know it well from my previous life.

“What will you do, about the position of the head?”

Words were spoken that had occupied the heads of everyone present.
I bit my lips a bit too hard, and tasted a bit of blood.

“…Origa is also the king’s niece. The ceremony of inheritance may encounter difficulties.”
“Then will we make a special case? It will be throwing away our pride.”

A discussion of whether or not to throw me away echoed loudly, someone even hitting their desk.
If it was me before I chose to heal Atlas, there wouldn’t have been anything to threaten my life.
Surviving anything, and ending up in front of Gil-sama.
But, how can I stand before the hero as a villain without any power?
I can’t stand as a villain, someone to be killed, anymore.

“It’s not acceptable for anyone to discover Origa-sama has lost her power. We’ll have to cover it up for now.”

None here intend to turn to me, the head, for my opinion.
A person who still respects me, when I’ve lost my ability as a magician, isn’t here.
None of them care about their head who abandoned them.

“For one, or two years, she can use injuries as a reason to not go out, but what about after that?”
“I heard that the boy who was thrown out awakened to magic recently. It seems he only shows compatibility for water…. How about trying to find if there are any other talented children from that generation?”
“Well then, should we have Origa have a child? Talent is talent. Surely it would be inherited.”
“Then who will you choose? I don’t mind if you choose from among us.”
“It’s necessary to give birth to a child with ability exceeding you. You must choose carefully.”

To have children, is one of the most important roles to propagating magicians.
Although I can’t use my power, I can give birth to a magician.
But, for something like this that isn’t even at the level of a political marriage, as if.

“…………”

Contrary to my hand that begins trembling, my mind gradually goes cold.
Behind my tightly closed eyelids, for some reason I recalled my mother’s lonely smile.

“―So then, is the former head fine?”

Raising my head at those words, I see the speaker looking at me like an object, emotionlessly.
Hidden behind those cold pupils, is it anger at the one who abandoned them?

“You don’t have to be worried about being closely related.”

Abruptly, an embarrassed voice spoke out― and quickly cut off.
Where is the former head? The inquiry moves to this final question, with steadily increasing discussion.
Even while knowing familial relations are a crime, they are choosing not to worry about it.

The decision, was made.

For a moment, I felt goosebumps.
And an uncomfortable sensation.
Even if I were to seek help from around me, no one here would look at me.
Even Keika is just listening to the discussion, unable to interject.
Even if I try to open my mouth to say something, I don’t know what to say.
Not even a villain, claiming I would protect the clan and then abandoning it, what do I have the right to say?
―Is this my reward?

“I said earlier that the vessel to be inherited was broken. Unfortunately, there is no way that a child Origa gives birth to will be a magician.”

At the words of the healer, who had been listening to the discussion with furrowed eyebrows, the men in the room uniformly lost the heat in their eyes.
Although these words are my salvation, they also deny any value in my existence.
The feeling covering me, must feel similar to how Gil-sama felt when he was watched-

“Someone, anyone, please come! ―It’s an attack!”

As that voice broke the humiliating atmosphere in the room, I stood up to escape.

“What’s the matter?”
“Hey, that’s..!”

Several people were shouting loudly as they arrived at the front gate.
With the successful recapture of the fort, and Gil-sama destroying the magic sealing stones as a water mage, it should be impossible to attack the Ruzil house, an important protector of the country.
I was immediately grabbed by the arm and hidden by a middle-aged man, but the appearance I glimpsed was familiar.
I wanted to confirm it, but the crowd was in the way and it was impossible to get them to listen to me.

“I am the head of the Harvester family, Atlas Ville Harvester. I’d like to see the Ruzil family head.”
“You’ve made the same request many times. The family head’s body has not yet recovered after helping you.”

As I struggled to see who it was, a familiar low voice entered my ears.
There was a level of tension in the voice that made it almost impossible to think that he was on the edge of death the other day.
The voice carries far- considering the distance from the front gate to here.
Perhaps someone is using wind magic… then, are there magicians among those few people?

“I heard that a healer was hired. The results should already have come out. That’s why I came here myself.”
“…That’s right. And I’m telling you that’s not enough of a reason to let you pass.”

My condition has been conveyed to the marquis. (Marquis is the plural form of Marquis)
This is because Atlas and I were rescued together, and I’m not sure if it’s already too late to hide the details.
If it is, it will have a major impact on the war.
Besides the Ruzil there are only the clans of the forest and wind; how much of an impact would if have if it was made public that the head of the clan of fire lost their power-

“Are you planning on throwing Origa away? Then, pass her on to me.”
“Don’t say such rude things about people.”

Yet, my thoughts were drowned out by the men’s voices.

“This is the Ruzil’s problem. It’s not something you, who are no longer the head of a clan, but just an ordinary magician, have the right to interfere with!”

Atlas isn’t the head of a clan.
Something like this doesn’t exist in my memory.

“What is he, talking about?”
“…the new Marquis of the Harvester family, Atlas, chose to relinquish the family’s title as a magician clan.”

The man concealing me behind him replies to my muttered words. The tension in the magic filled air is palpable.
Towards the young man who abandoned the pride of a magician, voices of anger and contempt filled the air.
Although the head of the Ruzil, too, has thrown away her magic, the men are shouting angrily.

Hang on.
I can’t follow this development.
I understand that Atlas came to see me, so why was it considered to be an attack?
Why did Atlas give up the title of a magic clan?
Even though developments and settings like this were never written anywhere in the novel.
While I was breathless from surprise to the point of being unable to speak, the voice coming over the crowd changed.
A smooth voice, slightly higher than Atlas’s- this voice.

“That’s right. I’m not a Ruzil, therefore what I say doesn’t matter- That’s why, I want to meet Origa, and hear what she wants!”
“You are…”

Gilford Ivlis.
The magicians who recognized the owner of the voice suddenly lost their voices.
Freshly blooming as a water magician, a child of the previous head of the Ruzil.
Perhaps because of a habit from when I was the head, the magicians who are looking at each other, unsure what to do, spontaneously began moving away from in front of me.
Although the heavyweights speaking in the front didn’t go anywhere, due to the thinning of the crowd I could properly recognize their appearances.
Atlas, Gil-sama, and some familiar armed youths in the surroundings- they are, those who have become national heroes.

“…Even a rotten head is still the head. I still have full responsibility as head of the Harvester family. You should just support me, Gil.”

The roots of the trees extend, following the breathing of Atlas as he touches the ground.
Seeing fog springing up behind that, the clansmen begin to panic.
Ignoring the forest magic, water magic is the natural enemy of fire magic, and the one manipulating it is a young man who grew up in the clan of fire.
Knowing all their weak points, and able to effectively use his magic easily since he already knows the structure of the mansion.
The fireballs they throw in a panic have their paths altered by the wind, flying into the magic-formed fog and disappearing.
In the meantime, the trees that tangled the gate tore it down with a groaning sound, and towards the magicians standing in front of them- towards me, continued to stretch.

From the other side of the crowd, Gil-sama saw me, and moved his mouth exaggeratedly.
I will definitely help you, so.

That, repeated many times.
I read it over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over again, words that I had longed to hear.
Hearing this line in this situation, laughter came from the bottom of my chest.
This is, my last chance.
This is, the reason I survived.
This is, the meaning of what the owner of that arm said.
【Origa】will not die here- this is the pre-established harmony.³

“…Keika, burn it down.”
At the words I muttered with a smile, the young fire mage made some noise.
I place my hand on the shoulder of my aid, still shocked stiff, and transfer the magic that has barely accumulated from my body to hers.
Even if I can’t use magic, the technique I practiced to the point of spitting up blood is more important.
And she is the one who has learned it the most closely.
Even though it’s extremely difficult, if I point the direction with my magic, it’s not something impossible for Keika.
I direct the flow of my magic power forward on the street, towards the magicians trying to fire their magic, and instruct Keika to control my magic orally, and she shook her head in surprise.

“Ah, for me… something like this….”
“It’s fine, so do as I say!”

Trembling, Keika forms fire as I instruct and strikes the origin of the magic creating the fog, causing a loud noise as the fog was boiled and turned to steam.
Continuing, I hijack the magic of the mages still working on their spells and bring it to the roots of the nearby trees.
The magicians look back at Keika and me, shocked, as we reproduce the magic I used once against my father in the inheritance ceremony.

I brush my hair back and step forward, and spontaneously the last of the crowd breaks.
Nobody tried to stop me, as the sound of my footsteps echoed.
The roots of the trees that stretched out from the gate were all scorched, and the air was foggy with water vapor.
But the person who was vaguely visible through all that just stared at me with round eyes, without using any more magic.

“It seems like you have fully recovered, Atlas. ……So, what are you here to do?”

Standing on the other side of the broken gate, Atlas frowns and hits Gil-sama on the back.
Startled, he grabs the distorted iron bars of the gate, and asks if my injuries are fine now.
When I nod silently, while staring at me with his beautiful green eyes, he releases the bars, and stretches out his arm. (TN Note: –  – surrounds a line Origa recalls reading from story.)

-Let’s go together, Origa. Even if you stay here, you won’t be able to change anything.-
“Let’s go together, Origa. Even if you stay here, nothing will change.”

Ah, that’s right.
The gentle words Gil-sama says.
How many times did I read that line?
How long have I been waiting for that line?
His kind hearted words of being unable to abandon his sister.

“You’ll just die if you stay here. I don’t want you to die, I want you to be happy.”
“…Why are you worrying about me so much?”
“When I’m aware you helped me, how can I let you die! You are- my sister!”

So.
The words【I】have been waiting for.
And that’s why, my response is already set.

“Do you understand who I am? The head of the Ruzil family, the vanguard of the country’s defense. There’s no reason I should be pitied by a loser who failed to be part of the clan of fire.”

The field of flames flashes in my mind.

-I am the head of the Ruzil. It is my duty to use my life to lead the family.-
“Leave. Even if I’ve lost my power I am the head of the Ruzil. It is my duty to use my life to lead the family.”

Standing there is a girl covered in wounds.

-I will live for the sake of my family, and die for the sake of my country. Do you have enough power to change anything?-
“I swore to live for the sake of my family, and die for the sake of my country. Do you have enough power to change anything?”

A young man shouting his desire to save the girl.

-My many compatriots, will you kill?-
“My many compatriots, do you have enough power for me to abandon them?”

And she tramples on the corpses of many compatriots.

-By you, who betrays everyone, my heart cannot be bent.-
“By you, who can’t abandon anyone, my determination cannot be bent.”

My lips, as I say this, slowly draw a smile.
Some scenes may not be reproduced, and they may have disappeared.
But, even as its shape changes, the story is continuing.
Tilting my neck slightly, I open my mouth once again and speak in a volume that can only be heard by those standing right in front of me.
This time, with【my】words.

“I am a sinful person. Those who are innocent, who don’t resist, who do resist, traitors, civilians, aristocrats, anyone who gets in my way, I have killed. Far more than you think. In much worse ways than you think. …..Do you wish happiness for someone like me? If you wish to save many, I myself carry the sin of killing many.”

How stupid it sounds, spoken out loud. Yet, I feel as though a weight somewhere in the recesses of my heart has lightened a bit.
After I whispered my sins, although Gil-sama, who opened his eyes as though he thought it was unbelievable, looked back at Atlas, Atlas only turned his eyes away without opening his mouth.
The words of denial he seeks from his best friend’s mouth will not come.
Because, even if not all of the sins I’ve committed, he probably knew some of it by intuition.
Laughter that I can’t resist comes from my mouth, and I laughed loudly for the first time in a long while.
In the smoky air where everyone is keeping their voices low, only my laughter echoes.

I am the evil that must be killed.
Even if I’ve lost my power, everything I’ve already done has been piling up.
As long as the protagonist realizes it, he will become the hero of the nation’s salvation by felling the existence known as me.
The symbol of the old era. The center of hatred.
I’m sure Gil-sama will be able to discover all the deeds I’ve committed.
And at that time, he will have no choice but to kill me.
Changing the world, with the death of a villain as the stepping stone.

“―I’m returning to my room. Please tell Atlas to return. If the discussion comes to a conclusion, please also tell me.”

I turned around, and not a single person followed me back inside the mansion.


  1. Keika chooses the side that’s winning.
  2. Term used was sensei, but she’s not calling him her teacher, more of someone with more knowledge? I decided on professor, master seemed too much, and doctor just felt wrong.
  3. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pre-established_harmony Apparently this is a thing. I didn’t know this was a thing and was confused until I googled it.

Last part- I believe she’s talking to all the people around in the area, not to Gil.

TL Opinions: I want Origa to burn all the higher ups of the family to a crisp.

As serious note, you can basically consider this translation to be on hiatus. I will continue working on it whenever I feel like it, but that’s unlikely to be very often. So if someone who actually knows what they’re doing wants to pick this up, please do. Like seriously, please do. I want this novel to be translated by someone who can actually give it a proper translation. Please.

(I will be working on this, but estimate the pace to be.. About as fast as this one.)


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Gomen ne, Onii-sama 3-4

Well I wasn’t very happy with that last chapter so I decided not to sleep and just crank this one out too. Don’t expect this rate to continue.


 

Gomen ne, Oniisama Chapter 3 part 4

And so the Villain Descends From the Stage

 

Staring at Atlas who had fallen, I felt as though time had stopped.
Now, what the hell, is this?

“…..Atlas?”

Blood flows from his chest.
He inhales shallowly, and blood overflows from his mouth along with the exhalation.
His hand painfully stretched towards and touched my boots, and scratched feebly.

“Impossible”

An excited voice reaches my ears.
I realized it was a surprise attack, as the man’s excited voice echoed strangely through the dark forest.

“Hey, they’re here!”

The man who called for support loudly, the one who killed him, perhaps recognized the girl kneeling in front of the fallen man as having surrendered, as she sat there with her eyes wide open and muttered to herself.
The murderous intentions and hatred can be seen clearly in his faraway eyes, as he prepares one more arrow, this time for me.

At this rate, I’ll be killed-!

I created pillars of flame to surround myself, and with a cracking sound, my【vessel】was further damaged.

“Ii- ah….”

My heart pounds, and I stagger a few steps unsteadily before falling to my knees.
Mana leaks uncontrollably, feeling as though it’s burning my whole body.
It hurts.
The pain brings tears to my eyes, and I find it difficult to breathe.
If you continue to use magic in a state of mana deficiency, your mana source takes the strain as damage, and if it’s severe instant death is likely.
It’s only by chance that I’m not already dead.

“Ah, shit! -backup, come – kill-“

I can hear a voice intermittently on the other side of the flame shouting to kill me.
The flame roars. The heat won’t hurt me, but having made this large barrier of flame, the enemy is definitely aware of our position.
Surrounded by enemies, although this will serve as a temporary barrier, it’s not even close to preventing death.
I’m not sure of the exact position, but if enemy soldiers are around, it’s likely that there is some distance to the fort, and that I shouldn’t expect help.

My magical power is exhausted, Atlas has fallen, what can I do in this situation to escape- my thoughts are interrupted by the creaking of my aching【vessel】.

“…..O.. w…”

The hot air I inhale stimulates me to move, and my copper hair shines in the light of the flames as I gauge the reality behind them.
The appearance of the bloody Atlas was blurred and hazy, like a nightmare.

Without the support of Marquis Harvester, Gil-sama would be instantly eaten in noble society.
Now old man Harvester has passed away, Atlas is the only one of Gil-sama’s friends who has enough power to secure his safety.
Even if… even if this Atlas has deviated from the story, that fact won’t change.
If here and now, Atlas dies- it’s impossible for Gilford Ivaris to become the hero and savior of the nation.

“….Atlas! Please, show me your wound!”

Something like that, isn’t “Gilford”.
Something like that, isn’t the story I loved.
There is no meaning in me dying for an outcome like that.

Although my imagination scares me, I have a more immediate problem.
I can’t afford to be distracted by pain.
Rolling over Atlas’s fallen body, the arrow wound catches my eye.
It’s stuck deep in his chest, but it may be okay if I stop the bleeding quickly.
Forcefully tearing off the military uniform that became stiff with blood, I look into Atlas’s face that is losing color.

“To stop bleeding…”
“Like I said, I’m fine… Don’t… try to help me.”

Lying on his back, Atlas smiled as blood flowed from the side of his mouth― I tried to conceal that the wound was too deep.

“Don’t make that face.”

At long last I’ve come close, but all I can do is stare silently as Atlas bleeds with a wry smile.
It seems like I’m watching a nightmare I’ve experienced many times.
But with the smell of blood, the sight before my eyes, the pain coming from the【vessel】deep in my body, it reminds me that this is reality- yes, not a novel.

As I held his body painted by his crimson blood, with choppy voices we discussed landmarks and directions briefly.
It seems as though Atlas will die.
But although I understand it, part of me refuses to acknowledge it.

“This is no good. This is no good, Atlas.”

When Atlas dies, Gil-sama, what will happen to the hero― even though the hero may not become a hero.
Should I just give up here?

Ah, why am I so powerless even when I’m the Princess of the Inferno?
The magic power that seemed endless is gone, there is no help, and without the ability to save a single life, I’m just an ordinary woman, a human who can only be ashamed at my uselessness.

Don’t die, I won’t let you die, I won’t forgive you for dying here.
Atlas smiled bitterly at me as I connected meaningless words, looking at the flames surrounding us, with clouded brown eyes, quietly spoke.

“I’ll heal myself, so. Before this flame pillar disappears, go. I’ll catch up with you.”

So run away quickly before backup comes, is it?
Such a lie.
There’s no way he can use magic in this state.
To use magic that requires the utmost concentration while in a state of intense pain, is completely impossible.

“N, no. I disagree. Let’s go together? I’ll carry you…”
“…I’ll catch up later. You should go.”

While knowing that it’s impossible, I continue to make meaningless suggestions.
If I wished to live, I should have escaped promptly as Atlas told me to.
But.
As Atlas took a package out of his pocket with his trembling hands, it fell on the ground, and he murmured that there was something he wanted to apologize for.
The hand he placed on my head is losing warmth far too rapidly.

“Escape safely, then… next time… I’ll… invite.. You…”

The blood, doesn’t stop.
His breath becomes shallow.
His body temperature is falling.
The light is fading from his eyes.
A voice, whispering possibilities of the future, stops.

 

―Ah, this too, is useless.
Even if, I see it happen, I can’t help.

 

When I released Atlas’s hand that I was holding, it fell to the ground powerlessly.
He seems to have already lost consciousness, and there is no voice to angrily tell me to run already.
Looking up at the sky, perhaps to seek salvation, or simply avert my eyes from reality, the night sky, shimmering in the heat, causes the moon to appear as though it is wavering like a mirage.
Beautiful like a dream.

“…aah, I’ve failed.”

So.
This life feels as though it’s all a dream.
I was sick and unable to get out of bed, just looking outside the window, waiting for a visit, nothing created, nothing destroyed, unneeded by anyone, living as if I were already dead.
I was reborn in the world I dreamed of.
I got a healthy body, and could stay near my favorite character.
Although it was certainly painful, the freedom of life outweighed that, and I felt joy that would be necessary in the future.

But, it’s certain now that it’s impossible for Gil-sama to complete his life as a hero.
In the future, those who should have rebuilt the country, will vanish from the front stage in the middle of their path.
What is justice without destroying evil?
What is a hero if he falls before reaching the villain?
If the hero is unable to fulfill justice, what am【I】?

“I am… Origa. Origa Emelda Ruzil.”

But, the contents are, while born as a villain, a woman who smeared her favorite story with mud.

“Ha… haha.. aha, ha…”

Dry laughter spills from my mouth.
The future of the magicians, the future of this country, my sins, the anger towards the king, greed, obsession, it’s all pointless.
Since I got into this situation, it’s sure that I will die here.
It’s the result of the sin of my greed.
Because I couldn’t hold myself back and held my hand out to someone I shouldn’t have, I changed the story into such a thing.
As a result, the villain Origa won’t leave anything, won’t be remembered by anyone, will die without any meaning- she fell to such a low existence.
The me who is just a magician, has no value.
The me who is just a girl, has no meaning.
A me like this, isn’t what【I】wanted to be.

….I don’t care anymore.
It’s too tiring. In front of me, I can see Atlas’s body.
If he didn’t get involved with me, if I didn’t move around so much, I guess he probably would have continued walking forward with Gil-sama to knock me down.
That his life will be lost, I don’t care anymore.
When I closed my eyes and sighed, suddenly I recalled Atlas’s voice from a time long past now.

“Can we… become friends?”

That’s right… Atlas is my【friend】, Gil-sama’s best friend.
Dying while rescuing a friend, even if it means nothing as a villain, it still means something as a person.
Regardless of whether it actually makes a difference, if rescue doesn’t come, I’ll die soon anyways.
Whether I live for one more minute or one more second, it doesn’t matter if it’s just prolonging suffering.
But.

 

“….But, because you’re a friend.”
I’m sure you’ll forgive me.

 

Atlas’s cheeks are painted by warm blood, as his shallow breath gradually weakens.
I have never used healing magic.
That is, because it was sealed away since it’s water magic.
【Origa】never used healing magic in her life― but it doesn’t mean it’s unusable.
The method, Atlas showed me a while ago.
Surely, I can.
Not as Origa, I realized a smile from【my】emotions was forming on my mouth.

I removed the vial from Atlas’s pack, and pouring the contents onto my hand, several pale colored pills rolled out.
Given the magic power that will be lost trying to use an unfamiliar magic, with just one or two pills, it won’t be enough.
One by one, I placed them in my mouth, but I got impatient and poured them all into my mouth at once.
The chewed pills rapidly melt in the moisture of my mouth, and magical power rushes through my body, through this cracked【vessel】.
My body screams with pain as my magical power is recovered far too quickly- this is definitely a lethal dose.
Even so, there was no discomfort like before.
Because my death will not be in vain.

My heart beats erratically, and I find breathing difficult.
The eyes of Atlas lying on my knees are already beginning to lose the last traces of life.
I’m sure he didn’t see anything, didn’t hear anything.
As I wipe at the blood sticking to his cheeks, I smile slightly, to give myself some peace of mind.

“Atlas, I will help you.”

I was surprised momentarily by the words that exited my mouth, but when I realize what I’ve said, I feel happy.
To be able to act for the sake of a friend without having to consciously think about it, just for a little while, I wanted to feel this happiness.

 

―If this makes my death meaningful, then I’m satisfied with this conclusion.

 

As I applied the magic, along with a sound like glass breaking, my consciousness flew away as intense pain rushed through my body.


 

I’m still not happy.

Personal opinions

Next goes to side chapter translated by Oniichanyamete

 

31/1/17 EDIT: If you’re checking to see if I’m still alive, I am… I have like half of the next chapter translated but I’m being lazy and not doing the rest………… I’ll do it…. soon…?


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Gomen ne, Onii-sama 3-3

I’m on break, but I’m still lazy…


Gomen ne, Oniisama Chapter 3 part 3

The Villain’s Rage, and the Man Who Collapsed

As I allowed my tears to flow freely, I hid myself at the base of a tree to rest for a moment.
Fatigue is visible on Atlas’s face, but he still shows no signs of giving up.
With all my tears emptied, and my heart finally calmed down, I remembered the words I had spoken.

Although Atlas must have been in pain from the death of his father, I forced him to speak of it and reopen the wound.
I’m the one who caused him this pain.
As I opened my mouth to apologize, a quiet voice reached my ear.

“Is your mana level ok?”

I realized that I had forgotten to pay attention to my own condition, and closed my eyes.
I could barely feel the slow flow of magical power within my bloodstream.
While examining my magical power, I even felt a crack in my【Vessel】- perhaps caused by forced use while in extreme conditions.
In the novel, the only time the Princess of the Inferno was forced to this state was when facing the hero.

―If I continue to use magic in my current condition, my life might run out before I meet Gil-sama again.

When I opened my eyes and gently shook my head, Atlas made a displeased expression and took off the bag that was tied to his back.
There were some dried goods and medicinal herbs in the thin bag, but what he pulled out without any hesitation was a small bottle.
It’s full of an uncountable number of pills.
I had to hold it up to the moon so I could see them properly, collecting the light reflecting off the glass and sparkling with a dull silver-white.
I’ve never used them. But, this…

“This…”
“It’s a souvenir from Gil.”

A medicine held by soldiers for emergency situations, that I never had the need for.
However, I believe Keika has used it several times.
A miraculous drug that rapidly recovers a person’s mana.
But also a poison is guaranteed to erode the body.
No matter how I think, I can’t understand, why this?
I look at Atlas, with a small smile on my face while nodding.

“Because you wouldn’t have had any need to use these, you wouldn’t know this, but as long as you don’t have too much at once there won’t be any harm to your body.”

I took a single pill in my hand, and before I could lose my will, start to put it in my mouth.
But, I quickly lose my confidence.
Because this, is poison.
The way he said it, it seems like he’s used it many times.

“Is that, knowledge from personal experience?”
“It is.”

The justice of the hero, even if it goes through twists and turns, should always reach its destination.
There is no death.
There is no cruelty.
There is no pain.
Tranquility, without any real danger, it should be a character that moves towards a predetermined outcome.
So then, why is he using such a dangerous thing?

“The training school is just a place I was a member of. Where I learned what I had to learn. It was just practice….. On the battlefield, I am a magician.”
(Uses different quotes; I don’t believe Atlas is saying this right now. Possibly a recollection.)

Ah, it was probably that.
That Atlas chose the role of a magician instead of a knight, was it not my fault?
Because I pointed to the role of a magician on that battlefield.
Because I struck down his justice with reality.
Then, this too. Is my…

“My portion is also there. They’ve been contained by water magic at an appropriate amount. It’s enough for me to recover at least to the degree of being able to defend myself.”
(Medicine is a liquid, made into pill form by wrapping with water magic)

I dropped a single pill into my hand, dully reflecting the moonlight.
This is poison for the body.
I’ll die if I swallow this,【I】scream in my mind.
But, if I don’t take this medicine I’ll die soon enough anyways.
It seems the mistakes I’ve made have come back around to me in the form of poison.

In that case.
As I bit into it, the bitter taste spread through my mouth.
I closed my eyes and swallowed, while ignoring the taste of medicine that brought with it an uncomfortable crawling sensation on my skin.

It may be presumptuous to say as the one saved by it, but I couldn’t deny that it was a completely reckless strategy after hearing it from Atlas.
Even if it was impossible to get back to the fort, it seems they would have considered it a successful rescue just by getting me back to the guerilla troops camped outside the fort.
However, with me in the state of anemia caused by excessive blood loss, it will be difficult to travel all the way to the support troops who have medics.
And finally, we were found by enemy soldiers.
Even after taking the recovery medicine, my magical power is insufficient to take out an enemy in one shot. But, Atlas’s magic isn’t suitable for sudden use or attack.
In the end, my magic only lasted partway before I ran out of magical power.

A body burnt black was revealed by the red glow of the fire- an unintelligible scream came from its mouth.

With the smell of burning meat, a low groan is mixed in.
In order to prevent needless suffering, I have to finish him quickly.
But even if I were to repeatedly attempt to draw out fire magic from this emptied out body, it would only result in more pain while lacking in firepower.
When Atlas, unable to remain indifferent to the man’s pain, drew his sword and stabbed the man, I could only stare in surprise.
Blood spurted vigorously from the man’s vitals, and Atlas was dyed by the dying man’s blood as he watched expressionlessly.

“Uu… ghh…..”

At this sight, my stomach turned.
I gritted my teeth.
Of course, my own actions are also terrible.
But, seeing it up close and experiencing the reality of it with the senses made me feel an aversion towards murder.

But, more than that- my mind yells, the hero and his colleagues shouldn’t be the ones piling up corpses.
The intense discomfort makes me feel nauseous.
Something like this shouldn’t be allowed.

Drinking poison. Killing people. What might be done next?
Unlike me, he’s a person who should take a straight path, one of those who support the hero.
A villain is someone already someone soaked in sin, but it’s not right for a hero to deviate from their path this much. Atlas shouldn’t be the one to commit sins.
Such thoughts push me to tell him that this is wrong. But, with my body trembling, I push back my clamoring memories.

“May I have some medicine?”

As I stretch out my hand him, stained by the blood of the soldier, I involuntarily take half a step back, but I can’t retreat now.
If a large amount of this drug is consumed in a short time, the side effects will occur more quickly.
Even if it’s processed with the healing magic of water, it won’t make any difference.
Even so, who can guarantee that the next enemy won’t be carrying a magic sealing stone?

“I’ll take care of the next one. So, you should focus your efforts on searching for enemies.”

In the novel, it is stated that my magic is the most suitable for destroying the magic sealing stones, guaranteed by the author’s words.
Even if Atlas doesn’t know of this guarantee, he should understand that his magic isn’t suitable for battle.
I continue speaking quickly to convince Atlas, who is raising his eyebrows.

“It’s alright, I won’t be noticed. I’ve gotten used to burning only bodies, so I can get rid of them without standing out.”

One of the flaws of fire magic is that the effectiveness is determined by the environment.
So, it’s difficult to do fine control in a bad environment, causing too much magic to be used.
But on this battlefield, over and over again.
So. After burning, and burning again, the precise control has been drummed into my body.

Guessing the meaning behind my words, Atlas’s gaze was shaken.

“You, possibly…”
“Because I had to do it, I did it….. There’s no way I’ll make a mistake at it anymore.”

Mages suffering in pain, implored me to use my magic.
The magicians I should have been protecting, I cut off their lives with my magic.
As that scene flashes before me, water naturally accumulates in my eyes.
The ones I burned were my allies, when it should have been used on my enemies.
Those that come against me will burn, even if they beg for salvation.

“So, may I have some more medicine?”

I’m not a magician of water- so all I can do is burn.
As Gil-sama once said, all I can do is create hatred.
Atlas was silent for a while, massaging his brow, then shook his head at me.

“I don’t like it.”
“Why? You can’t deal with magic sealing stones with your magic.”
“Deal with?”

As my irritation rose, I furrowed my eyebrows.
How much can I say about the method to destroy magic sealing stones? There is a limit even if the situation is bad.
But, as I recall the order in which events should flow, a warped smile comes to my mouth.

“Oh, I see… you don’t know yet.”

Without thinking, I accidentally leaked those words.
Atlas’s gaze pierced me with a look of questioning.

Oops, I messed up.

The destruction of magic sealing stones is done by pouring in an excessive quantity of magic.
Although it’s so simple, it’s impossible for average people to discover.
Gil-sama is the one who is supposed to first reveal the method of destroying the stones; it will end up being told to the military if I leak it here.
It might end up weakening the reputation Gil-sama would gain.

Well, but.
At what time, will Gil-sama be able to destroy the magic sealing stones― since in the story, it happens when I go insane.

“Origa, what the hell do you know?”
(Alternatives were “what the heck” and “what on earth” but those seemed too casual for this situation)

In his scrutinizing eyes, I wonder if I properly appear as the【Princess of the Inferno】.
As I kept my mouth tightly shut, Atlas opened his mouth to speak, and gazed at me with serious eyes.

“…..I know you don’t believe me. But I don’t want you, or anyone important to me, to suffer any more.”

Why are you looking at me with such blame in your eyes?
I have done nothing wrong.
Why are you spitting out such flimsy words?
You’ll just end up coming to kill me anyways.
You who should follow justice, why, for my sake?

“I’ll take this medicine. You won’t need to fight anymore.”

My emotions surge, impossible for me to control.

“―――What makes you think something like that is possible!?”

My yelling echoed loudly through the forest.
Why do I feel so frustrated?
What was given to Atlas, was the setting of living a good life as Gil-sama’s best friend.
The role given to me is to torture the hero, to rebel against the country at the expense of the lives of many.
Someone who doesn’t know anything shouldn’t deny my path.
Someone who can’t change anything shouldn’t deny my role.

“You don’t want me to suffer….? Then, let me fight! After all, I have no choice but to fight anyways! From the beginning, the past and future were already decided! Because I was born as【Origa】. Everything will go well as long as I’m gone. My death won’t be wasted― I know that, I know it all!”

I’m not afraid to live as a villain, and die as a villain.
Because, I know the magnitude of the influence this villain’s death will have on the hero.
I know that it’s an important role for guiding the story to a happy ending.
That’s why this is the only path for me.

“But, you messed up.”

A voice of blame sounds in my head.
If not for me, Harvester-sama wouldn’t have died.
If not for me, Atlas wouldn’t mess with medicine.
If not for me, so many magicians wouldn’t have died.
This is not the story I know.
So then, the significance of the villain’s existence.
I, what meaning is there in my death?

“Everything, ….ugh! Why did I….!”
“Calm down, Ori-!”

My constantly flowing thoughts revealed their ugliness.
The【Princess of the Inferno】dying while protecting the magicians, the dream I wished for on my sickbed, a dream that can’t be fulfilled, with hands covered in blood, my head hurts, a different story, the ending to come, will it be a hero walking on a path of justice?
―My thoughts can only conclude that this is reality, not a novel.

I hate it I hate it I hate it I hate it.
I want to face something like this directly.
Come here, so I can face reality.
In a frenzy I try to pull Atlas, but a strong arm pushes me and I fall on the ground.
Still trying to stand up again, I saw something from the corner of my vision.

“…..eh?”

Something grazes past my face, and strikes Atlas’s body with a dull sound.
He falls, and his collapsed body makes a pool of blood at my feet.


Merry Christmas.


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Gomen ne, Onii-sama 3-2

Conflicted feelings.


Gomen ne, Oniisama Chapter 3 part 2

The Villain’s Exhaustion, and the Man Who Offered His Hand

 

When I dismissed the idea that I was abandoned,【I】was relieved.
When convinced that I was abandoned,【Origa】was furious.
The process that I was longing for, is occurring in front of my eyes in reality, not a story.
With blood that seems strangely real, and the smell of burning.

―I can’t afford to die in a place like this.
―Quickly, I wish this story would end.
―Dying here has no value.
―This is already the end.

While various thoughts passed through my mind, I robotically continued to destroy magic sealing stones.
A simple path. If I encountered a place where it was difficult to use magic, I burned it thoroughly.
I don’t remember how many people I burned in the process, and my memory of the process is rather blurry.
If there’s nobody I don’t want to hurt, I can use my magic with no limit.
I can just burn anything that approaches me.
These small magic sealing stones, I can destroy without difficulty.
But while avoiding attacks by soldiers holding them, in the end I was forced to fight seriously.
By the time I realized I would be injured if I wasn’t careful, the tendon of my left arm had already been slashed.
I continued to lose blood and my consciousness faded, and performing advanced magic became more difficult as my magic power bottomed out.
Still, for the sake of living, I continued to move my body.
Ignoring the reason that I desire survival.

While I continued this way, mechanically reacting, someone jumped out in front of me.
Before I even registered it someone called my name.
They called me, grabbed my hand, and then I finally realized it was an ally.

“Origa!”

The voice I hear startles me- oh, this is a dream.
Although I somehow managed to open my mouth with my mind still clouded, my voice didn’t come out well.
I called the one with black hair with a hoarse voice, and his stiff face relaxed a little.

“Hey, show me your arm. You haven’t burned the wound closed yet?”

His face distorts with anxiety as he grabs my arm, wearing a navy military uniform.
Oh right, this is a battlefield.
I have to report since he’s wearing a commander’s uniform. I try to speak.
They aimed at the moment when it was my turn to sleep. I was tired by continuous battle. My mana was running out.
Things like that aren’t valid excuses, a voice reproaches in my head.
Because, the magicians he entrusted, the magicians who trusted me, I

“….couldn’t protect”

I should have protected them.
Perhaps he heard my lightly muttered words, since he took his hands away from my arm, and with a slight moment of hesitation touched my head.
I thought his fingers would get dirty, but it’s probably fine since this is a dream, so I didn’t say it.
If this is a dream, he can’t be defiled by my sins.
While I gazed vaguely at his eyes with my vision blurred, I quietly whispered in a voice as low as I could make it.

“You’ve already retreated.”

As I speak, the ivy crawls around the ground with Atlas at the fulcrum.
From what I’ve read, I think this is a magic for finding enemies?
Indeed, I feel like it was only used a single time for this in the story.
To show the backline support character as the main character on the front lines, it’s funny how inconsistent this dream is.
Within my shaking line of sight, is a happy vision.
Atlas, who is a supporting character, one of the main character’s friends, is using magic for my sake. He’s concerned for me.
What a happy dream this is.
As if this were the center of the story.
As if I were-

“Why, here?”
“I came to rescue you. The others are creating a diversion… oh, that large flame over there.”

Atlas pointed towards the roar of flame rising for just a moment far away in the forest, and I turned my gaze sluggishly towards it.

And, all at once I woke up to the bright color of the flames.
Whose flame it is, I determine in an instant.
―So, this is reality?

I thrust away Atlas with a slight feeling of guilt and responsibility towards him, and take some distance with what little strength I have left.
In front of him, who stares at me with surprise visible in his wide eyes, I spoke.

“Lies.”

There’s no reason for help to be here.
How much time has already passed since then?
Since the fort was recaptured. Since the magicians all died. Since I sent the last rescue signal.
My head works slowly, and I push the senseless jumble of emotions and words from my mouth.

“Sent a rescue signal… but, Harvester-sama, ….abandoned..”
“Hey, Origa?”

What am I saying? And Atlas is reaching out to me with his hands.
The hands of salvation that I’ve seen in my dreams- I knock down the illusion to break it, and raise my voice.
In my head【I】am calm and looking for the enemy, whispering, and【Origa】burning with anger is shouting that she’ll burn everything.

“The fort!”

My voice, trembles.
In truth I don’t want, to see reality.
In truth, I want to immerse myself in this dream.
But.

“I know that the fort was recaptured! But, how many days have passed since then? Even though we were so close by, not Harvester-sama, nobody came to help!”

One person, and then another, pierced through by a sword, and killed.
The healing magic can’t keep up, and blood continues to spill, and body parts are lost, unable to bear the pain I continued to keep our hope burning with my flames.
Nevertheless, they continued to die, smiling while dying in pain, believing help will come soon, burned into my mind forever.
Those who wanted to live, would die. Those who wanted to die, asked for my flame.
We risked danger to send the signal to request aid into the sky many times.
But every time we fired it into the sky, despair called to us, little by little.
It seemed, that I was watching【my】end.

“Origa,”
“Don’t touch me.”

At the recaptured fort, an unfamiliar knight order and Harvester-sama’s flags have been raised.
Meaning, that it is protected by the hands of a knight order and the magicians.
If there were only knights in that fort, his majesty would be forced to wave his hands helplessly. But, if Harvester-sama’s flag is also raised, magicians are also there.
That’s why, I continued to send the rescue signal with a sense of hope- Not just the soldiers, but even the magicians fighting on the same battlefield as their fellow magicians, why do they abandon their brothers?
Why is something like this permitted, even if it’s the way it was written in the story?

I am a villain.
If you want to kill me, if you want to bring me into it, then just focus on me.
There are countless sacrifices in the background of the story. However, they do not appear in the eyes of the heroes.
That’s why, I wasn’t aware of such a reality.
A villain standing by the hero, what kind of story led to this?
Was I toyed with and left in this wilderness?
What might he be thinking, standing here?

“What do you intend to do? For this person whom you abandoned, what use do you have?”

In the end I, Origa, an abominable magician will only be a problem in the times to come.
This country decided so, and cut me off.
Ignoring everything【Origa】has done so far to protect this country.
Even though we’re magicians the same, they take the face of the victims.
Acting like【Origa】is the one who carries all the sins.
The nature to betray. To sell off. To toy with. To step on dignity. To use hostages as shields. To be a great sinner and kill many.
The tendency to create the【Princess of the Inferno】- in the middle of killing me off, is justice pretending to reach me?¹

“Answer me. If you don’t intend to answer-“

Depending on his answer, I might burn him to death.
I begin to refine heat with my magic.
I may not have enough mana to kill him in one shot, but it doesn’t matter.
Even if the first shot fails, I’ll keep going, as many times as necessary.
Because, I can’t afford to die in a place like this.

But, Atlas’s low voice doused my spirit with cold water.

“My father, died when the fort fell.”
“….lies.”

It seemed as if he struggled to force each word out, watching me with a stiff gaze. He spoke, with no eloquence in his serious words, that it wasn’t a joke.
My concentration collapsed, the magic I was forming falling apart.

“Something, like that,”

Impossible.
Harvester-sama, the guardian of the hero, stayed alive until the time the Princess of the Inferno died.
That’s why, I wasn’t concerned at all about leaving Harvester-sama at the fort.
【The Magician and the Country of Night】is a story where nobody except the villains will die.
The protagonists will face many hardships, but will succeed in the end, that kind of story.
It should be a story of such a righteous path.

But, I distorted the story.
This influence, did it cause the death of someone who should have lived?
This influence, did it cause my deployment to become so insane?
Since what time were the gears of this world so twisted?

―For the answer, since when did I turn my eyes away?

Although Atlas’s hand once again takes my arm as I stand dumbfounded, this time I don’t have the energy to ward him off.
He lightly grasped my left arm with his right, and spoke quietly to me.

“….Press it. Although this will only serve as first aid, it’ll close your wound for the time being.”

Slowly, the healing magic soaked into my arm, mending the wound from which blood continued to flow.
Even if it’s connected, I don’t know if I’ll be able to move it again.
There’s no need to waste magic on something like this.
Even though I tried to say thus, the words didn’t come out from my hazy mind.

“My father”

Perhaps, the magic Atlas used also had a sedative effect.
My emotions that refused to listen to his quiet words, gradually calmed down.

“I’m sure, was worried about you until the end.”

If it was Harvester-sama, definitely.
The feeling of a large hand, stroking my head.
Larger than Atlas’s, and warmer.
The face behind the hand is always smiling.

“There are a lot of people that would prefer if you didn’t return. ….But, I’ve made a promise to bring you back to the guy who is praying for you to return.”

Who on earth are you talking about?
I slaughtered many magicians, many enemies. I stand on a pile of corpses.
Who on earth, would pray for me?

“Let’s go back, Origa.”²

My thoughts are jumbled. I have no ideas. I don’t know what I should choose.
But, through my view blurred by tears, my trembling hand gripped the steady one offered to me.
Watching, as my blood slowly stained Atlas’s dark blue uniform.

 


TN Notes
1. The kanji 癖 is used for each of these short lines, which means something along the lines of habit/nature/tendency. However, in English rather than a feeling of repetition and emphasis it just ends up seeming draggy because the words are too long :( So, I just included it once.

2. Uses verb to return, which is specifically used to return “home” or something similar


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Gomen ne, Onii-sama 3-1

Ehum… sorry about the delay, I was feeling lazy…  (。・ ω<)ゞ

On to chapter 3, a time skip, and a new point of view… at least, for this part.
I’m 99% sure it’s from Atlas’s perspective.
Also an important note, take all the translations of rank/title stuff with a grain of salt, because I’m not putting a lot of effort into determining what’s above what, and it’s entirely possible that I’ve translated some wrong.
Three different important people here – the head, blond hair messenger, gray hair old guy. Don’t ask me if you actually need to remember them.


 

Gomen ne, Oniisama Chapter 3 part 1

-The Villain’s Absence, and the Man Who Would Risk His Life-

 

Through the efforts of the Fifth Knight Corps, the recapture of the fort was successful.
But, the detached force had their retreat cut off and were erased.
Although at first they fired many flares requesting aid, the number slowly reduced as time passed, until finally, not a single flare rose.
A notice was sent indicating that a rescue attempt should be made, along with an order to wait― Surely, the relief troops would be sent, they believed.
But.

The messenger who brought the notice that she should be honored as the【Protector of the Country】the next day, never changed his expression.

 

 

It suddenly became noisy outside of where I was taking a nap, so I got out of bed in case of a raid.

It’s not impossible.
We’re quite tired, having spent all our energy recapturing the fort.
It’s not strange for an attack to occur before order is properly established.
I hail the soldiers who are passing by in a hurry, and follow them to see what’s causing the commotion.
Looking into the crowd in the dining hall, the people in the center are the head and my best friend-

“We’re moving to try to find her current position. It’s not something you need to worry about.”
“You’re checking, and that’s it? When will you send real aid?”
“You’re being disrespectful. Down, Gilford.”

While he closed his mouth and seemed daunted by the head’s low voice for a moment, he moved his grip from the head’s arms, and raised his voice at the messenger once again.
The messenger fended off his grasp with a tired face, rather easily, since it’s a conversation they’ve already repeated many times.
―This is Origa’s problem to face. If someone were to intrude excessively, it would probably only make the situation more complicated.

“Stop it. She said to deal with the things on our end. We sent soldiers to check as soon as the enemies retreated.”
“That is to say, you’ve given up on rescuing the unit led by Origa?”
“You can take it as such. I doubt headquarters will care.”
“………”

From the lip I bit, there was a slight taste of blood.
The knight order that was only just founded.
Right now they’re only an order in name.
They were forced to carry out the strategy without any countermeasures against the magic sealing stones, but succeeded unexpectedly thanks to Gil’s strange magic.
Originally, they were just a throwaway pawn, to earn some time.
Even if they’ve made some achievements, they’re still looked at as a mere group of commoners lead by the head.
The head who knows he has no power to speak here clenched his fist silently.

“There are companions seeking relief in front of us! They’re close enough for us to help! …..Why are you abandoning them!”
“I’ve made my decision. I can’t afford to put the fort in danger right now. I’m sorry for Origa, but I can’t justify risking a fort to retrieve a dead body.”

Everyone was already thinking it somewhere in their hearts.
The signal for requesting aid was interrupted a long time ago.
The number of remaining mages that could be confirmed by telescope was only three- and that was half a day ago.
Before the shock of those words of the commander could even spread through all the soldiers in the room, a cold voice echoed through the room.

“Origa is alive.”

In the air that filled with a sudden silence, the messenger realized his slip of the tongue, and cleared his throat in the silence.

“….I apologize, but there has been no evidence of the use of fire magic from the beginning. The only reasonable conclusion is that she has died.”

The battle that occurred around the fort was intense. It took three days for the fort to fall.
It’s difficult for a magician to continue fighting without food or rest.
Magic is powerful, but a mage’s body is no different than that of an ordinary human.
Everyone knows that.
That’s why, there is no credibility in his words of survival.

“Origa is, still alive.”

Gilford, realizing that his words had no persuasive power, held his left shoulder with his hand, and repeated his words under his breath.
The blonde haired messenger let out a sigh, spread his arms towards Gilford, and spoke loudly to the crowd.

“Then who do you intend to send to the rescue? This country will fall into a crisis again if we reduce the strength of this fort. ―No, are you planning to throw yourself out there?”
“That’s right.”
“Ridiculous. Your ability to destroy the magic sealing stones is an important source of hope for this country. The first thing we need to do is analyze how you destroy them.”

It seems to be so? He looked around and smiled, as everyone watching was not willing to respond to his remarks.

“Magicians are becoming useless in this era anyways. Rescuing her while sacrificing the lives of valuable soldiers, what use will it have in the future?”

By those words, I finally made up my mind.

“―I suppose, that I’ll go. I won’t force all of you, but I do request your help. It’s rough with just me.”

I raise my voice, and move to the center of the vortex of people.
When the messenger heard my words while wearing a dubious expression, their eyes opened wide in surprise.

“Atlas-dono!”
“I’m a magician. As long as the magic sealing stones are on the battlefield, I’m not a fighting force.”
“Such a thing…! You are the heir of the Harvester family, it wouldn’t do for you to waste your life on something like this.”
“The Harvesters are a clan of magicians. I believe it was you that said magicians will be useless on the battlefield…. So that means?”

When I returned the messenger’s previous words pointedly, they looked down while their face was stretched by embarrassment.

“But, isn’t her survival hopeless? To send soldiers for her alone, is too wasteful.”
“What foolish words. Even if the Countess was killed, she is a noble woman who is a member of the royal family, and there is no mistake that she is a hero of this country. This is a problem related to the morale of the whole country. We have to go if only for the sake of mourning her death.”

If Origa is dead, it’s highly likely that my efforts will be in vain on the battlefield, and I will die easily as a magician.
It’s normal to think that Origa Emelda Ruzil is dead.
It was one day ago that we confirmed signs of a battle, and there were no signs of any magic from it.
Even I have half given up on her survival.
But, if Gil who was given that scar by her says it-

“And, as an individual- I bet on Gil’s words. She is not dead.”

Perhaps, Origa is still alive.
I show a smile, and Gil shows a surprised expression, and I look at the gray haired man left over. (TN: Not the messenger.)

“Then, if you go to rescue her and fall, what will happen? Your predecessor died in this fort, and even if you haven’t officially inherited the title yet, you are the head of the Harvester family. Is it not your responsibility to be the leader?”

The gray haired man’s words struck directly at the heavy stone in my heart.
The responsibility as the head of the clan.
The heavy duty for the clan of many magicians responsible for the country.
The invisible chains that were carried by the successive heads.
If I were to deny his words, and take my own path, it would be to deny all the struggles of my fathers.

“The Harvesters”

Still, a smile comes to my face as I continue speaking.
I ran away from it a long time ago; I ran away and wanted to escape.
I was frightened by the figure of my friend struggling under that weight, and aimed to become a knight.

“The blood of the Harvesters is too thin. My family is already gone. The number of magicians that can truly claim the name of our clan can be counted on one hand. I don’t yet have a child- therefore, I believe my cousin will lead well. I appoint him as the successor.”

Now that I’ve put it into words, how silly it sounds.
―In the past, the Harvesters were not a【magic clan】.
That heavy chain that I am supposed to inherit from my father has already rusted and decayed like the rest of the house.
In the future, being part of the Marquis family will only bring pain.
Even if the last one to realize it is myself, it’s fine to reach out to a friend when you’re suffering.

“…..Do as you like.”
“Burges-dono!”
“You will be silent. If this insult to milord Harvester continues on any longer, I’ll be forced to report it to the upper level.”

The blond haired soldier was silenced by the gray haired soldier’s words.
―The negotiation has come.
Now, I turn my attention to the one standing next to me.
I grab his arm as he insists that I don’t go, and whisper in his ear.

“Gil, listen. Even my father was let down. Those of the upper class don’t care what happens to the magicians.”
“That is…”

Even though the one defending the fort was the head of the Harvester family, they made no efforts to send relief quickly.
As a result, the fort that was defended mainly by magicians fell.
Was it the work of those who would sell out the country, or an act caused by the disgust for magicians? Although it wasn’t possible to determine until now, it seems it’s the latter.
But even if they dislike it, if there is an existence that can destroy the cause of this overwhelmingly disadvantageous situation-
According to the reaction of the gray haired man, they’ll ignore our actions of attempting to rescue Origa.

“Their objective is you. Please, buy as much time as you can.” (Atlas)
“…..I understand.”

一After receiving his confirmation, I let go of him.
Take this, please, and give it to her, Gil muttered, and I laughed while putting the small package he handed me into my bag.

I roughly understand how Origa treated him.
Still, whether it’s because he’s a naive person who’s worrying about his sister, or because he understands her true nature- that conclusion came out a long time ago.
You should do it more completely if you’re going to push him away, is what I thought when I was told that【secret】by Gil.
While feeling a little funny, I looked indifferently back at the head to convey that I’d be handing Gilford over to him for now, and looked back at the messenger while raising my voice unnecessarily loud.

“Shall we find some land for Gilford Ivaris in my territory?” (99% this line is wrong.)

At those words, the messengers showed shocked expressions.

“I believe his Majesty is going to grant them some territory as a reward for recapturing this fort?” (TN: Them = 5th Knight Corps, I presume.)
“But, it’s not very close to the battlefield? We will need Gilford Ivaris for the battles that are to come―”
“If this doesn’t go through, I have no way to persuade Gilford. I’m sorry, but I’d like to convince this stonehead myself, without having the royalty intervene. I doubt that he will seriously obey your orders.”

As soon as we recaptured the fort, the information that one of the magic sealing stones was successfully destroyed was sent to the Imperial City.
But, perhaps due to the complexity of the procedure, Gilford was not formally summoned by the royalty.
As it is, his mission to【protect the fort with the Fifth Knight Order】remains unchanged.
If we plan to take action outside of our duties, some concession is necessary.
I turn my gaze towards the gray haired soldier who appears to be the one in control, and he nodded reluctantly.

“….I agree.”

When I turned back to the head who was watching silently, he nodded to show that he accepted the deal.
His testimony, if it becomes necessary in an emergency, may have its reliability questioned because of his social position.
The head has no backing. If any pressure is put on him, he will fall.
However, he led me when I was lost, he forgave the path I chose, and he’s someone I rely on more than anyone else.
Now that my father is dead, he’s the only one I’m willing to entrust with my close friend.

“Head, thank you for always supporting me.”

To the head who banged my head lightly with an astringent face, I lowered my head with a feeling of nostalgia.
As I jump into the battlefield as a magician, already, I may never see this mentor again.’
I raised my head to announce our departure, shaking away the sentimentality.

“It’s as you heard! Please, help!”

When I call out to the restless audience, their eyes all wander elsewhere.
To go rescue Origa, it’s doubtful whether or not they’ll return alive.
We don’t know if she’s alive in the first place.
If you think about this as one who protects the country, as a knight, the defense of this fort is more important than the life or death of one person.
Even if they’re a magician- no, especially if they’re a magician, they will definitely die if they leave this fort and a magic sealing stone is present.
For anyone to volunteer would be surprising.
Even a single person choosing to volunteer would impress me.
However,

“I will go.”
“…..it will be dangerous.”

A woman with short hair inhales, and pushes her way through the crowd to come forward.
Her face seems familiar, but only vaguely. She claims to be a follower of Origa.
When I asked her if she would prioritize a new leader of the Ruzil over Origa, she replied with a small smile, “I would not.”

“To me, before being the Ruzil family head, she is the benefactor who found me. If it’s to help Origa, I’m not afraid of the magic sealing stones. For the Ruzil- please, use my life.”

Seeing a woman kneeling and making such a wish, several magicians and soldiers follow.
Each of them told me, that Origa had helped them before.
Looking around, no one else is willing to volunteer. I tell them that I have no intention to blame them for turning away their eyes.

Thus, I received permission to attempt a rescue in exchange for the custody of my best friend- Gilford.

 

 

After the magic sealing stones began to appear three or four years ago, the magicians became increasingly useless in combat.
一Even if they face a single ordinary soldier, if that soldier carries a magic sealing stone, they become helpless to resist him.
Because of this, magicians are simply assigned one to a squadron for assistance, but the non-magicians don’t feel very satisfied.
On the battlefield, even an intermediate magician is seen as nothing more than luggage.

The once glamorous era of magicians, is over.

My friend will be injured easily, a woman, and in addition, without any of the standard training soldiers receive.
Even though she has an absurd amount of magic, it would be difficult for her to fight back once surrounded by enemy soldiers with magic sealing stones.
No matter how excellent a mage you are, if you continue using magic without a break, your mana will run out, and you will die.
It’s only a matter of time.
That’s why Gil suspected that Origa was hiding her expressions.

While running through the bushes while holding my body low, I heard a roaring sound.
Looking back a bit, a large red pillar of flame is visible.
The amount of flame, its momentum, it’s all impeccable.
However, while it certainly seems similar to Origa’s flames- it won’t be able to fool the enemy for long.
The difference between her and her follower is not the number of years they’ve practiced.
Above all, Origa’s characteristic is her inexhaustibly large, uncountable amount of mana.
An amount of mana that makes me unable to believe that Origa is able to bear it without screaming.
An amount of mana that would take any ordinary mage hundreds of years of training to catch up with.
That’s it.

Through a thin strand of ivy I stretched over the ground to find the enemy, I feel someone’s touch.
Hidden in a trunk just wide enough to conceal my body, while manipulating the thin ivy, I was able to determine the number of people surrounding the ivy.

―One person in the shade of the rock, four people in the grove.

I touch the sword attached to my waist while adjusting my breath, and begin preparing magic.
While I don’t intend to fight this number of people with a sword, it’s possible that using magic will attract reinforcements if this takes too long.
It’s possible to knock them out quickly with magic, but if more soldiers come with magic sealing stones, the number of people I knock out won’t make any difference.
A little unsure, I removed the hand I had on the sword.
If I use magic, then I’ll do it with a single blow.

The whip that I sent from the trunk, before it could kill its target- was burned instantly by a bright fire.
I avoided the fireball by rolling sideways, and heard the screams of men from the grove.

From the shadow of the rock, I am very familiar with the person who comes out.
The apex of magicians, the symbol, the protector of the country.
Always full of confidence, always dependable, always an unshakeable existence.

“Origa!”

However, the eyes of my friend who looked back were blank.
Her left arm was dyed more red than her eyes.
From the fingertip of her dangling left hand, blood slowly dripped.
Dyed with mud and blood, the pale-faced Origa was there.


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Gomen ne, Onii-sama 2-8

One whole chapter/section completed, a bunch more to go.
A short one, so it was quick.


 

Gomen ne, Oniisama Chapter 2 part 8

Side Story – A Report on the War

Esmeralda Kingdom, ruled by the Emelda family for 262 years.
Secretary 【–––】reporting upon the military situation.

The Sidris allied forces encroached on our territory in the north, with the intention of war.
They broke our defensive line temporarily by disrupting the supply routes, isolating the troops.
In the three days before the fort recapturing tactic was implemented, which will be described later, 40% of the troop was lost.
How they discovered our supply routes so easily is puzzling, but although the presence of a traitor is suspected, there is no proof.

The northwestern Salud Fort surrendered to the enemy invasion in only two days.
Along with this, the fort commander, the magician Edlis Ville Harvester was killed.
Due to the disturbance in the command chain, many of the junior soldiers defected from the main unit.

The Eighth Knight Corps established by His Majesty the King was dispatched to this battlefield.
Salud Fort was successfully recaptured by the guerrilla tactics of the knights.
By collapsing a mountain road, the enemy’s path was cut off.
Also, the knights confirmed successful destruction of one magic sealing device by a single person.
(This subject requires additional investigation.)

On the same day, in the forest located north of Salud Fort, the destruction of the magician corps led by Origa Emelda Ruzil was confirmed.
From there, the magician’s path,

 

 

The name of the person who made the report is unreadable.
In addition, the information hereinafter has been burned away.


TN Note: I don’t like translating names. :(


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